judgemental pastels and those who love them

Today's top story: I spend too much money on booze.



I didn't say it was shocking news.

I signed up on mint.com, which is a snazzy website that tracks and categorizes your spending. This is all in an effort to become a normal functioning adult that doesn't have to mutter a small prayer for available funds every time he swipes his debit card. On the site you can set budgets, sort your purchases, etc. I did have to disable one feature; it emails you when your checking account gets below $100. HA. Silly website. Just like I would tell my dates if I ever went on any, you should go ahead and lower those expectations now and we'll all have a better time. Email me if it ever gets over $100 and then we'll party like it's 1999.

Anyway...I got it all set up and humming along, and this weekend I get an email notification:

So far this month, you've spent $100.04 on "Alcohol & Bars." This exceeds your budget of $70 by $30.

Keep in mind, this past weekend was the 13th. Meaning not even halfway through the month. Meaning oh fuck. Meaning I'm stuck on this question:


Why does it suck to realize something you already knew?


Last week on Top Chef (one of my many reality TV addictions), a guy got called out on the carpet and told exactly what he did wrong. Upon returning to the other contestants to await his fate, he said, "It's not getting told you sucked that hurts; it's knowing that they're right."

Why is this?

I mean, I obviously know my tendencies. It's no secret I enjoy an adult beverage on occasion. I buy me a drink, I buy my friends drinks, I buy drinks for bachelorettes and birthdays and cute boys and sometimes even not-so-cute boys depending how long I've been hanging out with my partner-in-crime, Maker's Mark. So....I know. I know what happens when I get the firewater in me, when the strobes and the bass and the pretty people blur my discretion and this Stella gets her groove back. I know, and apparently I don't care until I see the cold hard truth with a light green glow. A source that doesn't bend to excuses or explanations. It just reflects the facts, no matter how uncomfortable that might be.

I'm glad I have my new minty friend, even though it brings unwelcome-though-not-shocking news. It's easy to forgive ourselves. But occasionally we need a rude awakening to shake us out of our comfort zone, the disciplinarian that makes you sad to make you grow. Because it's all too easy to ignore the facts, especially when they're not fun-fun happy time facts.

So forgive me if I don't buy a round these next few months. If you had to go home and answer to mint, you wouldn't either.