inventory

Here's a brief, stream-of-consciousness thought for the moment -


Recently I find myself taking a mental inventory of my room each night before bed. I know this has to do with my imminent move, because it's not something I usually do. Not actually thinking in terms of size, quantity, or value, but more along the lines of sentiment and origin.

Tonight I keep looking at a picture propped up on a shelf. I don't have many hard copy pictures anymore thanks to the wonders of modern technology, but this one I've had for six years. It's an action shot of me and my best friend from home. We're at her mom's house, in the back living room, and I remember it like it was this morning. It's a textbook action shot, candid to the point of embarrassment. We're off-centered and oblivious, belting out Wham! as if our lives actually depended on it. What you don't see is us getting stoned beforehand and eating lasagna out of the pan, or me getting a handjob on her mom's brand-new couch after everyone else passed out. What you do see is happiness. Living in the moment happiness. Happiness even though my hair was too short and her mouth was wide open, both of us waking someone up before they go-go. We were nineteen and everything was perfect.

But of course it wasn't perfect. There were undoubtedly the standard doubts and disappointments. But now the rough edges have been smoothed by time, and all I see is the happiness.

I lead a pretty awesome life, even when it's not. You probably do too. Let's make that a focus for the remainder of the week, yes?

Namaste, friends -

J